instructions.net.au

I do not venture into book stores, I find them depressing places, all of those poor homeless books! I am pretty certain that the larger stores have an entire section titled ‘When Science Meets God’, as there seem to be a plethora of books doing the rounds on this very subject.

One of the problems with science is that much of it is beyond the comprehension of the man in the street, Chaos Theory, Strings, Dark Matter, while these are all important elements of modern science they are far beyond high school level physics. However these explorations into our physical world have revealed much about us, and directly contributed to our understanding of ‘how things work’.

At the other end of the spectrum are the religious zealots, that view science as hocus pocus and a device of Satan designed to weaken religion by casting doubt on the ‘factuality’ of the various religious texts. Most of the squabbling concerns just two words, Creation and Evolution. These two words have caused more arguments than determining whose turn it is to take the garbage out.

Personally I have no beef with science or religion, and am dumbfounded by those that do.

There are a number of scientists like Leo Kim who want to try explain that both mind sets can co-exist, science is not trying to disprove the existence of God, it is merely trying to understand the world that we live in.

Healing The Rift explores some of the areas where science and religion have their major differences in interpretation and does a good, if slightly complicated job of it. I am sure that I am like most people, I have no concept of very large numbers, I understand a hundred, I have no problem with a thousand, I can even understand one hundred thousand, which is the number of dollars I would like to be earning each year. I can understand these numbers because they have a direct correlation to my real life. But when I am faced with Billions, Trillions, I have no concept, nothing to relate them to in my life. I have read various books about the probability of life occurring out of the primordial soup of our early universe and the odds are very much against it, a concept that the religious corner use as proof that God had to have been involved.

Leo Kim quotes from a well known astrophysicist Sir Fred Hoyle who likened the probability of the emergence of a single-cell organism to the likelihood of a 747 self constructing itself as a result of a tornado hitting a scrap yard. Yes those are pretty long odds! Pretty much akin to the monkeys, typewriters and the Works Of William Shakespeare analogy.

There is another way of looking at it though, the universe is a pretty big place, and events were happening everywhere, and for a very long time, so it is not unreasonable that something seemingly very unlikely could occur.

Healing The Rift is by no means a light read, and delves into many areas that cross into unknown territories, the afterlife, near death experiences, and the mind, to name a few. Is it convincing? The short answer to that is that I do not know. I had no conflict between Religion and Science when I started the book, and have none now that I have finished reading it.

You can pick up your copy from Amazon. Leo Kim also has a web site with some additional thoughts.

(Originally published at Blogger News Network and reprinted with permission from the author, Simon Barrett).

About the Author:
Simon Barrett is the senior editor for http://www.bloggernews.net and maintains a personal blog at http://zzsimonb.blogspot.com. Now semi retired in the depths of Mississippi he has plenty of time to read books by up and coming authors.

Keyword tags: science, religion, spirituality, healing, self help, God, universe

If you’re like almost everyone else in the world, then you’ve probably experienced that moment when you stop and wonder where the time went, and how you could have missed the last few weeks or months or more.

It’s definitely hit me on many occasions, and what’s more, it seems like the older you get, the faster time goes. I think I might have come up with an answer for why this happens.

Obviously, time doesn’t move any faster or slower at different points in your life, but our perception of time passing often changes based on what we’re doing. You know the old saying, “time flies when you’re having fun”? Well, it’s true in a sense. When your mind is occupied, you don’t notice the time passing. And conversely, as I’m sure you know, if you sit and count the seconds, they seem to take forever.

But this only explains minutes or hours. What I really want to talk about is longer time periods like months and years passing us by.

I think the same rule applies, but on a grander scale. So, for example, when your head is buried in your daily routine – waking up, going to work, coming home, taking the kids to soccer practice, eating dinner, walking the dog, going to bed, and doing it all again the next day (you know the drill) – months pass just like that without much notice.

Now, before I go any further, I don’t want anyone to think that I’m telling them to stop going to work, or taking care of their kids, or anything else. But I think it’s important that we break up our routines with other activities from time to time. Look up and take everything in once in a while, so to speak.

That’s why vacations are so important. A study done in 2006 by a few former NASA scientists (and bankrolled by Air New Zealand) showed that workers are 82% more productive if they take regular vacations. So using the excuse, like so many do, that your work will suffer if you go away doesn’t hold water.

So if you’re 82% more productive at work, then that probably means that you’re a lot more well adjusted after a vacation. You get away, you clear your head, you *gasp* enjoy yourself, and then you return refreshed. So it doesn’t just have a positive effect on your job. It has a positive effect on everything. And it breaks up the monotony.

Keep in mind that all of this is coming from a recovering workaholic. In my past jobs, I almost never used my vacation time. I was one of those that insisted that I was the only person who could do my job properly, and if I was away, the work would suffer. Little did I know what I was missing out on.

For a lot of people, their job is the source of the problem. The 9-5 grind isn’t for everyone, and it can really get you in a rut where you lose all track of time. If that’s the case, then you might think about looking for another job. Now, I’m not a job search coach, or an expert on the subject in any way, but I do know that a change of scenery can often do a lot of good. And, again, it’s something that can break up the monotony, and really help to slow time down.

During my days as a web designer, I met a number of people who work this way. Essentially, on a freelance basis. They work at one firm for a few weeks or a few months until the project is completed. Then they go to another firm for a few months, and so on. They all say that they find it fulfilling, and it keeps them from getting into that rut.

If you’ve been thinking of changing jobs, then maybe this is the type of work you might enjoy. Take a look at your experience and your interests, and the job opportunities in your area. See if there are any that you can do on a temporary freelance basis. But don’t just run off willy-nilly and quit your job without a plan. There are many professional coaches, career counselors, and job placement firms around the world who can help you with this. Make sure you do it right.

If you’re perfectly happy with your job, and not interested in changing it, then maybe having your own activities and hobbies that you take part in outside of your daily routine is the right thing for you. For example, in the summer, my friends and I play softball in Central Park. I have other friends who like to surf, or hike, or write, or draw. Something else to do besides work and responsibilities all day. Something to break up the monotony.

But the basic point is that every now and then you’re going to need a change. You can’t keep doing the same things all day, every day. It’s not healthy. It’s unfulfilling. And, let’s face it, it’s kind of depressing.

Maybe that’s why time seems to pass so slowly to children. Partly, it’s because they want to be older, so they want time to move faster, but it’s also partly because they do a lot of different activities. They haven’t started working regular shifts, so they haven’t stuck their heads in the sand and started to drone through a regular routine. As a result, most kids take in everything around them.

There are many adults that are able to do this, too. There’s no reason why you can’t be one of them.

There are lots of things that you can do to enrich your life. Things that will be fulfilling, things that will be fun and relaxing, things that will get you out of that rut, and maybe even slow the passage of time. Or, at least, time as we perceive it.

All you really have to do is stop and look around once in a while.

About the Author:
Mark Yarrobino is the administrator of http://www.learntochangeyourlife.com, a website designed to help its visitors find the best information available for making a positive change in their lives. Most of the information is provided in the form of articles and interviews with industry experts.

Keyword tags: self help,self improvement,personal development,career

When we are young we assume that being old won’t happen to us. Old age is so far away we think it doesn’t matter, or maybe the event will forget us when we get there. Getting old happens to us in spite of ignoring it. It’s not an easy process, either, and is not usually done gracefully. To compound the biological problems, there is the pervasive and ignored ‘ism’ of our day, ageism, where the elderly are essentially ostracized. (More on this later.) It’s a tough row all of us must hoe one day. The actress Bette Davis summed it up like this: “Growing old is not for sissies.”

Not only do physical capabilities ebb with the years, but mental skills do as well. The elderly can cycle back to the physical and mental incapacities of being an infant. The time in the center of life when we are fully capable is but a brief window. Our problem is that in this window of the middle years we think old age is way off in time. So we don’t store up health treasures to be redeemed later on in life. Living for the moment, adopting an if-it-feels-good-do-it attitude, and traipsing through life under the mistaken assumption that the wonders of medicine will fix anything that breaks, is the formula for health disaster in the golden years.

To harvest health in the latter years requires cultivating it in the early ones. As previously explained, most of the chronic degenerative diseases that rob life begin in childhood. The good news is that most of them are preventable with proper lifestyle and diet.

We hear reports of how science will extend life to 150 years and even beyond. Aside from the fact that science has not extended life at all, and is nowhere near that capability (proof of this follows), in the state many people find themselves at even 50 or 60, who would want more time of that? Life in a nursing home crippled, demented, incontinent, breathing tanked oxygen, or on life support is not particularly attractive.

Although I discuss at length whether death is really The End in the companion book, Solving The Big Questions, let me here say that there is a time for the end of life on Earth and that is not necessarily bad or something to fear. When life brings more pain than pleasure, death is surely a welcome relief. In fact, when you think about it, all of life is filled with a series of deaths. The innocence of childhood, the thrills of the high school years, the security of life at home with parents, young love, children of our own, the excitement of a new career, a first car and home, the ‘stuff’ of boats, clothes, tools, furniture, etc., is temporary. They all, in effect, die because they pass or lose their glamour. My daughter recently remarked to me as she was moving through young adulthood, “Everything is becoming more real, less fantastic.”

If these deaths in life are not offset with new adventures they can mound up as only memories to make life a very depressing ordeal in the later years. The trick is to not let life degrade to nothing except an accumulation of memories. Life is a participation sport requiring that we fill it with new challenges, never stop growing, and that we make a point of becoming a better person. That is the only way to make growing older worthwhile—yet another beginning chapter to look forward to, not a final one we wish would end.

Aging is, in part, self-imposed because as we get older we convince ourselves we’re supposed to slow down. We don’t grow old; rather we become old by not growing. We are not an exception to the rule that all things like to take the route of least resistance. It’s easier to not learn more, not be creative, not develop a new skill, not become fitter, increase strength, or develop athleticism. Being ‘too old’ is a convenient excuse to not apply the force to life to improve it and prevent its slide downhill.

Our body and mind rise to the challenges we place upon them. If we do something, we will be something. Do nothing and we become nothing. Be increasingly inactive and we will achieve the ultimate inactivity—death. The best life of all is to not permit the decrepitudes of old age and die old as young as possible.

Forget the numbers attached to life. Don’t assume that forty means easing off, fifty means retiring, sixty means incapable, and seventy means being just an observer. Life is about pushing ourselves mentally and physically, always seeking new horizons. That’s what can make life fulfilling to the end. If we plan to live forever every day, we can always say, “So good, so far.”

This is not to say that age does not slow us down and decrease capacity. At age 80 we can’t run the same time in the 100-meter dash that we did at 25. Nor should we try since the inherent strength and resiliency of an older body is less and thus more prone to getting broken. We’re like rubber bands in that regard. Stretch a new one over and over and it doesn’t matter. Get one out of the back of the drawer that’s been there for a few years and try the same thing and it will break apart. But that’s okay. We can still stretch our lives; we just have to be more careful.

Also consider that what we lose due to physical attrition we gain in experience and savvy. It’s pretty satisfying to get to the point in life where there’s nothing much left to learn the hard way, and most everyone around you is younger and therefore less experienced. With age we don’t have to guess so much about things or embark on time- and energy-consuming adventures that are fruitless. Having been there and done that gives us confidence, even smugness, with respect to the frenzied and dead-ended activities of all the young gaffers.

Living a full life means deferring less and less to teachers and mentors. We become the teacher and mentor. It is no longer necessary to be in awe. We can discern, be critical, and perhaps even make better sense of things than most of the supposed experts out there—if we have lived as if thinking matters. Although humility and learning are always in order, shifting roles from life’s student to teacher and leader—from taking to giving—is something to welcome as one of life’s wonderful rewards. It is a reward only possible if we grow older.

(Originally published at GoArticles and reprinted with permission from the author, R.L. Wysong).

About the Author:
R. L. Wysong is author of several books; his most recent is Living Life As If Thinking Matters. He has practiced veterinary surgery and medicine, taught college courses in human anatomy, physiology, and the origin of life, directed research for his health education and product development company, and heads the Wysong Institute. Visit: http://www.asifthinkingmatters.com/livinglife.shtml.

Keyword tags: health, aging, well-being, self help, ageism, books, writing

Stress is the condition which a person undergoes when he has to deal with situations which are beyond his grasp. He is unable to cope with the impossible circumstances and develops stress. The definition of stress differs from person to person. What constitutes stress for one person might be a normal everyday occurrence for another. But it has been observed that most of us go through stress at various times of the day. It might be due to work or any other state of life. While most of us get used to dealing with stress in our everyday life, it turns out to be very difficult to deal with it in the long run. It might lead to awful conditions which are very harmful for us. For this reason, it is imperative to get self-help for stress management.

Symptoms of stress:

Stress can be identified in many ways. There are many symptoms associated with it, the most common being headaches and muscle pain, dizziness and sweating, nausea and bowel problems, thudding of heart and a shaking of the entire body. You feel tense and very much wanting in self-esteem. This will lead to feeling irritable and wanting to become a typical introvert. Memory seems to fail and you start drinking and smoking all the more. Severe problems of the heart, asthma, migraine and insomnia might also set in if the stress stays for a prolonged time. Self-help to stress management acquires great importance under these circumstances.

Methods of stress management:

Managing stress can have a very significant role in your life. You need to find out the situations or the conditions which trigger stress in your life. After recognizing them, you need to work on how to break free from them. In due course of time, you will get to prevent these stressors from affecting your life too. Drinking and smoking are not the solutions to stress; in fact, they make the situation worse. Self-help for stress management is indispensable and this is how you can do it.

1. Acceptance of the problem is the biggest step towards finding a solution. Half the battle is won if you accept that the situation is beyond your control. Difficulties arise in every person`s life and at this time, the support of friends and relatives counts a lot. Turn to them for advice. Let bygones be bygones and move forward in life taking a lesson from the situation.

2. Now that you have identified your stressors, try to avoid them and stay away from them. If you are away from the environment, you will feel less stressed.

3. It is very important to talk about your problems to someone who will understand you. Seek out a friend and let go of your feelings.

4. Take charge of your feelings. See if you can control your feelings related to stress. Inspire yourself by constantly reassuring that it is only a passing phase and you will emerge stronger from it. Try to develop interest in other things which will divert your mind from your problems. Exercising and eating a balanced diet is good for your system. Meditation will also give you respite. When your body and mind are at rest, you will never be stressed. Self-help to stress management is best for you.

5. Keeping an optimistic view will help you manage things better. If you always think with a negative attitude, then you will only be hurting yourself more. Try to think positively and defeat stress.

6. Take plenty of rest and have at least 6 hours of sleep. A body which has been rested will never be irritable and so will help you to recover fast.

Learn to relax yourself and you will see that self-help to stress management will indeed make you a more complete person.

About the Author:
You can have access to articles about self-help in portuguese language from page http://www.polomercantil.com.br/auto-ajuda.php Roberto Sedycias works as IT consultant for http://www.polomercantil.com.br/

Keyword tags: self help, stress management

I guess almost everyone has their “two kinds of people in this world” saying that they like to invoke whenever the occasion arrives, and I have to say, I’m no exception. In my opinion there are two kinds of people in this world: Those who do things, and those who complain when things aren’t done.

Now, obviously, that’s a generalization, but what I mean by that is essentially this. Think about some of the people you know. They’re all different, of course, but there are most likely some who have the attitude that they will take care of it (whatever it is) and you don’t have to worry about them. They’re responsible, reliable, and positive.

Then you probably also know some folks who are the exact opposite. They want to know when someone’s going to come along and take of that thing (whatever it is) for them. They’re not responsible or reliable, and they complain often. They make a lot of excuses for why they can’t do something, and they’re generally pretty negative.

I suppose that’s all a little vague, so here’s an example. Years ago, I was a manager at a retail establishment. We had all sorts of employees working for us. But you would quickly learn who was willing to work and who wasn’t. Let’s call them doers and complainers. The doers would run to the back and get new stacks of shopping bags if we were running low. They’d refill the paper in the registers that printed out receipts. They’d put unpurchased items back on the sales floor. They’d *gasp* help customers who needed it, and maybe even do it with a smile. And they would call the manager (me) when there was a problem that was my responsibility to handle.

The complainers would complain that they were out of shopping bags or receipt paper. They’d complain about the stacks of items that needed to be returned to the sales floor. They’d complain that every customer was a jerk before they met them. And they’d either call me too often, because they didn’t want to deal with anything themselves, or they’d never call me, and I’d find out about certain problems when it’s already too late.

The doers would usually get promotions and raises, or move on to a better job elsewhere, while the complainers would generally go nowhere.

So how can you apply this to your own personal development?

Think about your own attitude, and how you react in most situations. Do you generally try to make things better, or do you generally wait for someone else to do it? Do you find yourself complaining a lot about things that, when you really think about it, you could handle yourself?

It’s very easy, and often satisfying, to complain. And it even feels good at times. But in the long run, it makes your life much more difficult and unsatisfying. And it keeps you down.

This isn’t to say that you’ll never have reason to complain or feel bad. And there will certainly be things that happen that are out of your control and you’ll have to call the manager. But it doesn’t have to happen as often as it does for most of us.

If you want your life to change for the better, then it’s important that you start taking responsibility, and start taking the necessary steps towards your goal. You have the power in these situations.

And by the way, don’t let this confuse you into thinking that you’ll never need any help from anyone else. Doing too much is a recipe for disaster, too. But that’s a topic for another article.

Basically, I’m talking about what I always talk about. Setting realistic goals, putting together a game plan to achieve those goals, and most importantly, acting on them.

So who are you? Are you the type of person who’s going to take the proper steps to improve your life, or are you they type of person who’s going to complain that life stinks and make excuses for why you can’t do anything about it?

That’s a pretty loaded question, but I think you already know who you need to be. All you have to do now is get to it. You’ll be surprised by the amount of things that you can do.

About the Author:
Mark Yarrobino is the administrator of http://www.learntochangeyourlife.com, a website that helps its visitors find the best information available for improving whatever part of their lives they feel might need it through articles and interviews with industry experts.

Keyword tags: self help,self improvement,personal development,motivation,getting things done

Stress is always present in our day to day life. If you understand and learn the techniques of self help to stress management, you will be the happiest person in this world who can enjoy all the moments of your life without allowing stress to override you. Although stress itself is not a disease, but it is a contributing factor towards triggering various diseases such as asthma, skin diseases, allergies, migraine, irritable bowel syndrome etc.

Stress can make you unhappy and can make you depressed with anxiety and feeling of inadequacy. Dissatisfaction with life and pessimism becomes a part of your life and people under stress become irritable and hostile. It is sure to influence your work performance and make you unable to concentrate on your work and reduce your decision making capabilities. Physical symptoms of stress will help you realize that you are suffering from stress. These symptoms may include palpitations, dizziness, loss of appetite, digestive problems, feeling tired, reduced sex drive, frequent infections etc.

The best way to overcome stress is to beat it with self help techniques and exercising self help to stress management will also help you in gaining confidence in yourself. In order to manage stress, first of all you have to find out the sources of your stress. Once you are able to find out the exact reason which is making you stressed, it will be easier for you to find ways and mean to deal with that reason and overcome stress. Once you know what is stressing you, you can decide whether you can let go of these or not.

If you cannot do away with the reasons of your stress, than you have to adopt techniques to learn staying with those reasons without stressing yourself. You have to practice relaxing. Relaxing will enable you to lower your blood pressure and stabilize your heart beat enabling you to regain the equilibrium of your body. Closing your eyes to release tension and breathing slowly and pausing after exhalation will help you to relax your mind. It is a fact that quick-fix breathing can release tension in difficult situations. You must practice breathing slowly from your diaphragm and calm yourself by taking several deep breaths.

Meditation is another fruitful technique of relaxing both your mind and body. It induces mental awareness of human beings and helps in deep relaxation. While meditating, sit upright closing your eyes and focus your mind on an object. Looking at an image of a candle flame or flower and repeating word such as `Peace` can help you meditate effectively.

Exercising and practicing yoga is another way to combat stress. Exercising dispels stress hormones from your bloodstream and gives you a feeling of well being. Yoga with controlled breathing and meditation is by far the most effective self help to stress management. 15 to 60 minutes of exercising with about 30 minutes of moderate activity can provide your body with required stimulants to combat stress.

Aromatherapy oils such as cedar wood, geranium, basils, bergamot, rose, lavender, used alone or in combination can work wonders for stress management. Massaging these oils on your forehead and scalp can give you the much needed relief from existing stress and can activate your energy to fight future stress. Drinking plentiful of water and intake of herbal teas can also fight stress. Excessive caffeine intake can stimulate stress hormones and should be avoided to fight stress.

The above steps on self help to stress management when followed can do wonders for a stressed person and can show him the path for leading a stress free life.

About the Author:
You can have access to articles about self help in portuguese language from page http://www.polomercantil.com.br/auto-ajuda.php Roberto Sedycias works as IT consultant for http://www.polomercantil.com.br/

Keyword tags: stress, self help

Your personal life is in shambles. Your husband cannot find the time to spend with you and your children never give a damn about what you say. You don`t feel like entering your own house. Everything you say or do seem to be wrong.

Well, if this is the situation, then you are desperately in need of self help. It seems rather easy to say that you need self help and quite another thing to avail it. It is not a medicine which can be downed with a glass of water and everything will be fine. In fact, you need a lot of discipline and determination to lead the life you want to. Only then you will not only have a husband who loves to talk to you but loving children who will also dote on you.

Get motivated:

It is certainly not easy to get self help. You ill have to come out from the shell you have created around you to seek opportunities and prospects which will work in favor of you. You will have to overcome the inherent fear inside you and undertake some risks which will again put you on the right path. Despite the difficulties which pursue you, you have to take charge of your life and persevere to get self help. You have to motivate yourself to achieve your objective. The path is ridden with intricacies but you have to overcome them to get back your life along the right path again.

Love your neighbor:

It is very difficult to find success when you are in need of self help. It takes discipline, passion and time. You also learn a lot from past experience. The lessons of life will teach you to become a strong person and to be in control of yourself. You are sure to get better with time and experience. You must remember not to hate the world just because you have happened to meet people who did not gel with you. If you hate the world, you will only get back the same in kind and with interest. In order to be successful, you need to strive hard, be more assertive and creative and stay focused to attain your goals.

How can you get self help?

* By learning to love the present – Try to appreciate the positive side of life. Speak kind words about your boss, co-workers, friends and family members. You can even respond to strangers with affection in your voice. Although this is a very good form of self help, it is not very easy. But you can achieve it with a strong will power. However, stay rooted to the ground and don`t lose sight of reality.

* Learn to balance your life – There is no reason to be hasty. Take one step at a time and dream big. Take positive actions but remain enthusiastic and patient. While embarking on the journey through life, just stop by at times to appreciate the good things of life. Try to believe in the policy: forgive and forget.

* Remember humility – When you are getting better in the course of self help, don`t be sarcastic at others who are less fortunate then you. Instead, be helpful and try to imbibe an aura of your positive attitude. You are sure to feel a lot of happiness in the process.

* Be sure to accomplish your goal – It takes a lot of courage to get self help. Go through the journey with a positive feeling. Stay focused till you reach the end with continued enthusiasm.

Self help will help you learn a lot. You must remember that you are not alone in this journey. There are many others like you. Try to get help from people like you and in turn help others from your positive experience. It will surely do you a world of good.

About the Author:
You can have access to articles about self help in portuguese language from page http://www.polomercantil.com.br/auto-ajuda.php Roberto Sedycias works as IT consultant for http://www.polomercantil.com.br/

Keyword tags: self help, personal development

I’ve been talking a lot recently about the different barriers that we create for ourselves that prevent our success, so I thought I’d continue in that vein today by talking about another huge obstacle: our fear of failure.

It’s a fear that seems at once both reasonable and unreasonable. Reasonable, because it’s common and natural and we understand why the fear exists. Unreasonable, because it’s unnecessary, and because it holds us back.

So let’s start with reasonable. That is, the common problems.

In a lot of cases, the fear of failure is a social thing. We’re afraid that if we fail, we’ll look foolish in front of others, and those who told us we would fail will be proven right.

To that, I say, you can always find someone to run you down. Most people don’t like for others to do something they don’t consider normal or safe. And many people don’t like for others to succeed. So they pass their negativity and fear onto you.

There are two answers to this problem. The first is to show them that you have a clear plan for making the change you’re making, and that you have a reasonable fallback option if things don’t work out perfectly. The second answer is to ignore them completely. I’ll leave that up to you.

Another obvious cause of the fear of failure comes from when we consider the consequences. It’s perfectly understandable that when you look at the worst case scenario, you’ll be afraid of the worst case scenario. And it’s certainly wise to plan for that. But that’s not the only possibility.

I recently spoke with marketing coach Jonathan Fields about this. His advice in this situation is to ask yourself three questions: What if I fail? What if I do nothing? What if I succeed?

Make sure you come up with good answers for all three questions. He says that more often than not the people that he’s coached that do this exercise end up taking action and succeeding. And I believe him.

OK, so we understand why it’s reasonable to be afraid to fail. Now let’s talk about why it’s unreasonable. Here it is in a short, pithy sentence: It’s OK to fail.

If you ask me, failure is the best teacher, as long as you pay attention to it, because we learn from our mistakes faster than almost anything else. Faster than we learn from good advice or guidance most of the time, even if it comes from an expert or parent or teacher. We can be told what to do in most situations, but there are a lot of cases where learning as you go is best. And that means that you’re going to make mistakes.

Be honest, you’ve made mistakes before. It wasn’t the end of the world. It only becomes a problem if you keep making the same mistake when you already know that it’s a mistake. Some people do that, but most animals (humans included) are great learners. Kind of like the way you once touched something sharp, hurt yourself, realized that thing is sharp, and decided to be more careful next time. And hopefully, you walked away with only a mild boo-boo.

Well, the same thing is true in your personal development. Most people that are dedicated to their development try new things all of the time. Of course not every new venture works out. And they may screw up a job interview, or fail a test, or lose some money, or whatever, but they stick with it. And they do it again, but now with more knowledge at their disposal.

Why can’t you?

It’s perfectly normal to make mistakes. Hell, it’s normal to fail miserably. And, unfortunately, it’s normal to let that scare you off of ever taking another chance in your life. There’s an old saying that says something along the lines of you’ll regret the things you never tried much more than the things you did try and failed at.

So after all of that blabbering, my basic point is this: If you’re really interested in your own self improvement, then set out a solid plan, make sure you have options if things don’t go exactly according to your plan, and then get to work.

And then, as is inevitable, fail, correct it, do it right the next time.

Remember, success depends on failure. Good luck.

About the Author:
Mark Yarrobino is the administrator of http://www.learntochangeyourlife.com, a website designed to help its visitors find the best information and real world methods for making the positive changes they’ve always wanted to make.

Keyword tags: self help,self improvement,personal development,success

Generally when I sit down to write a book review I have the review mapped out in my head, and the review itself is a straight brain dump onto my keyboard. Not so in the case of Living Life. Actually this book could have been equally well titled ‘The Book Of Everything’. It is part philosophical look at the state of human kind, part self help book, and part glorious rant.

While hardly a quick read at a 500 pages I did find most of it immensely entertaining, but likely not for the reasons that Dr. Wysong was aiming at. I always enjoy a good rant about pretty much anything, One of my favorite pastimes when I was in school (too many years ago to even think about) was to engage teachers in debates, the subject did not matter, and I cared little about which side of the issue I took, I guess you could call me adaptable. There are always three versions of every story, there is mine, there is yours, and there is the truth, which lays somewhere in the middle.

Dr. Wysong has created a wonderful canvas for debate, much of what he writes about I am in agreement with, although he does have a somewhat unusual and provocative method of introducing his concepts.

On the subject of health, Dr. Wysong essentially paints a bleak picture, The entire industry has become a self fulfilling prophecy. Needless tests, needless ‘procedures’, and needless expense. Only go to the doctor if you are mortally ill, is the message we get. This is a sentiment that I share, I had a bout with the health care system in 2007, and hated every moment. I was subjected to CT scans, MRI’s, X-rays, heart monitors, mercilessly poked and prodded, all in the quest to prove that the $30 blood pressure machine had been correct, and I did in fact have high blood pressure. I am sure that the total bill was several thousands of dollars, luckily the only out of pocket expense I had to occur was the purchase of a bottle of baby aspirins ($1 at the dollar store).

The health system is badly broken, that is for sure.

Dr. Wysong correctly suggests that many of todays ailments are self inflicted, the food we eat, the environment we live in, pollution, life style, and other elements all act as catalysts to health problems.

One analogy brought up certainly got me thinking, most of the scientific community agree that the Earth is about 3.5 billion years old, if we were to convert that into a more meaningful number, lets say a highway that is 550 miles long. The distance traveled since the industrial revolution would equate to approximately one inch of this wonderful highway. That is a very sobering thought. In that one single inch we have managed to scar our planet and ourselves.

The Self Help aspect of Living Life, I found curious though not engaging. We live in a world of acronyms,there is a short cut for almost everything, I base that on over 30 years experience in the computer industry, when computer guys talk it is no longer English. Dr. Wysong would like us all to adopt just one more. SOLVER, this includes:

Take Self Responsibility
Open Our Minds
Thing Long-Term effects
Give Virtue Priority
Consider All The Evidence
Let Reason Lead

Sorry, but this is not the easy to remember and catchy phrase that it could be, and is very unlikely to win the acronym of the year award.

On the plus side, he does bring out many salient points, we all do possess the ability to change not just ourselves but the world we live in. If you think that there is nothing you can do to modify the world, you are wrong. There is much that an individual can do, as Dr. Wysong says “one step at a time”.

My favorite aspect though of the book are the rants, Health Care, Eating Habits, Business, Government Subsidies and Socialism, to name but a few. They all are exceptionally well executed. One of my favorites involves the Space Shuttle, more importantly the external fuel tanks used that are manufactured by the Thyokol company. Their diameter Dr. Wysong patiently explains has its roots in a horses ass.

I will end this review with my starting comments, I liked the book, but probably not for the reasons that the author intended. Living Life is a fun read. The book is also peppered with amusing cartoons, quotes, and less than reliable excerpts from Internet E-mails of urban myths purporting to tell important truths.

You can get your copy from Amazon.

(Originally published at Blogger News Network and reprinted with permission from the author, Simon Barrett).

About the Author:
Simon Barrett is the senior editor for http://www.bloggernews.net and maintains a personal blog at http://zzsimonb.blogspot.com. Now semi retired in the depths of Mississippi he has plenty of time to read books by up and coming authors.

Keyword tags: book reviews, authors, writing, self help, philosophy, life, fulfillment

Many times we begin to feel stuck in our relationships, as though it’s impossible to make the changes in ourselves that we want to make. Old habits and memories reappear frequently., pulling us back into old patterns and fears..

However, there are easy, unfailing steps we can take to healing our relationship. These steps are easy, enjoyable and life giving, and all that is needed is a willingness to put these simple steps into action one by one.

Step 1: Take responsibility for whatever’s happening. Realize that for things to be different, you must be different.

Many try to change their relationships by finding what’s wrong in their partner, fixing it, talking things over endlessly or finding someone new. But whatever is happening, you are participating in it, and wherever they go you take yourself along.

For the relationship to be new, you must become new. Commit to spending even 15 minutes a day, taking new steps. Commitment is the first step.

During this personal time, take complete responsibility for what is happening in the relationship. This does not mean “blaming yourself”. Just take a good look at what you are doing to keep the problem going, what benefits you are getting out of the situation as it is. When you see you part in the situation you become empowered to make real changes.

Step 2: How you think affects how you feel, and how others respond to you.
Our thoughts are not really secret or silent. When we either secretly or loudly blame, criticize or want to change another, we create an atmosphere around us which pushes people away. Stop indulging in negative thinking. You have the power to change the way you think. Choose positive, loving thoughts. Replace each negative thought with a positive one.

When you look at your partner focus upon their beauty and strength. Say to yourself, “I salute the goodness in you.” On some level they will hear you, feel uplifted and respond. Call forth the best in them. And in yourself.

Step 3: Do What You Love Together

What we love has power in our lives. Doing what we love is medicine. It makes us happy, inspires us and stimulates the imagination and with that which is most creative in ourselves. Take time to do what you love together.. Many relationships become stuck because the partners are spending more time alone doing what they care about than together. Bonds are built through sharing meaningful times.

Most people wait to be happy – making it depend upon the way their partner treats them.. But, when you do what you love, you are happy each moment, just with the doing itself. This is a wonderful way to be together – not dependent upon what happens in the future – just fulfilled with each moment as it comes along.

Step 4: Let the Past Be The Past

We often carry around so much baggage that it is amazing we can even take another step. Many of us feel that past events are unresolved or unfinished until we work them out. However, at any moment we have the power to declare things fine and complete. At any moment we can stop trying to change and control the way life has happened thus far. Make that moment now. Put down old baggage. Let go of old events in your relationship and accept that things work out the way they do. Resolve to start fresh together. This is a new day.

Step 5: Think of Your Partner Before Yourself

Usually we approach relationships wondering what we can get out of them, but, in order to find happiness, just turn this around. Think of the other person first. When with them, ask yourself, how can I serve you today? What can I do to make your day wonderful? Not only will the person feel the change in your approach to them, but you will feel wonderful and fulfilled. Your sense of greed, deprivation, self-absorption and upset will vanish as you fill yourself with thoughts and deeds of service to others.

About the Author:
Discover the surprising truths about love that will save your relationship, best selling e-book, Save Your Relationship (21 Basic Laws of Successful Relationships)http://www.truthaboutlove.com. written by top psychologist and speaker. Contact at: topspeaker@yahoo.com

Keyword tags: love, relationships, marriage, dating, singles, psychology, marriage counseling, divorce, self help