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From the earliest times our Celtic and Druid ancestors from Iron Age times and probably before, the countryside in which they lived was the centre of their universe. It was full of meaning and wisdom. The trees were particularly important in the role each should play in their lives. We can once again use this ancient wisdom, along the part the trees played in the seasons of the year, and the time of birth and death in their lunar months. One of the trees that had great powers in their world was the Blackthorn.

It was firstly symbolic of its bright white blossom in the early spring. A coming out into the white pure light, shown by the brightness of its flowers appearing out of the darkness of the winter, like our ancestors we can see this time of blossom as time of coming out of a black period, a time of darkness, of death, and a new awakening. A time of a stirring of positivity within one’s self and a time of emergence from the long dark times of winter, a dark place, time of difficulty, a depressing time. Let the blossom be your light at the end of the dark tunnel.

As the first green shoots of the early leaves start to appear, so our first creative signs will start to appear, nourish them and let them open out as the leaves of the Blackthorn open out in nature.

The Black thorn is the Tree of Strength and Perseverance, so strong and resilient is its wood to the weather, the cutting of its branches for staffs and also for the shillelagh, it is hard wood and, grows back very quickly and stronger, and can grow where many other trees cannot. Let the Blackthorn be your strength, your perseverance, use it as your staff, as did Joseph of Arimathea when he arrived in Glastonbury and planted his staff which took root and blossomed. Let you creative thoughts planted blossom and come forth in positivity.

On your path there will still be trials and tribulations, but new growth of your strength will see you through, with the help of you staff and perseverance. The Blackthorn as it name implies, is a thorny tree, this is for its protection and it also protect all who use this protection for the safety of their nests, their homes, and in caterpillars, their metamorphosis into beautiful butterflies, and in this way the Blackthorn will protect you in your infancy of your new found creativity, and during your metamorphosis into the wonderful being you are, so that you may bask in the warm rays of the sun in harmony with mother nature.

The Celtic other use for the Staff or walking stick or Shillelagh was as a Cudgel combining supportiveness and a way of fending off people in self defence, this you can remember when anybody tries to beat you down or suppress those new creative thoughts and aspirations, a the Blackthorn also is sin ominous with standing up for ones rights, assertiveness and obstinacy, which is not a bad thing in rebuilding ones life.

The Celtic People also believed that the thorns on the tree provided protection for Ghosts, particularly in Ireland, so the tree can also protect you for your ghosts, and lay them to rest.

In Irish stories Blackthorn could be used in spells of protection, heroes were aided, if they threw a twig of Blackthorn afternoon, it would take root and form an impenetrable hedge or woods, thwarting the pursuing giant, in the same way the blackthorn can protect you by putting an impenetrable barrier between your new beginnings and that was behind you.

In England Witches would carve the Norse Rune Thorn on a Blackthorn Stave for protection. Traditionally, Blackthorn is used in protection against evil, creating boundaries, purifying, confronting our own dark side. Black thorn dispels negativity, toxins, old wounds and impurities. It is used in exorcisms, and associated with chthonic and protective deities. All these assosciations will help you reinforce and protect your way forward along your path toward your aims and self belief.

Blackthorn Trees and Shrubs are said to be held sacred by fairies. The Luantishees are the Blackthorn Fairies, who guard the trees, November 11th is their festival. All thorny trees and shrubs are said to serve as meeting places for fairies. Kindling a fire of thorn wood atop a fairy mound is also said to force a fae to return a stolen child.Let this be your sacred and the meeting place of your thoughts to decide which path to follow to achieve everything have ever wished for.

A Blackthorn Stave in the creation of a Sprite or Spirit Trap, it is used in combination with copper wire, which must not have been used for the carrying of electricity. The copper wire is bound to the stave with red thread and the stave is marked with a Dag or Rune. The procedure is carried out mainly for its symbolic value in religious tradition. The single traps are used at night, when the trap is set at the entrance to a home, church, graveyard or other location were sprite disturbances are taking place. To attract the troublesome entity, a cleft Blackthorn Stave with a lighted candle is place in front of the trap.

After the Sprite has been captured, it is removed from the location, and the red thread is cut with a consecrated knife, the thread is then placed into a prepared witch bottle. If the bottle has been prepared to imprison the sprite or spirit, a spell is recited while the thread is placed into it. Finally the bottle is corked and sealed with red wax before being buried. A Blackthorn or Thorn Bush or Tree is planted on the site. The witch bottle is a very old spell device that has stood the test of time. The spell is a magical act intended to cause an effect on reality using supernatural means of liturgical or ritual nature.

In this same way if your sprite or spirit comes back to bother you,simply wind some red cotton or material around your door handle before retiring to bed and in the morning cut the tie and put in a pot and bury it, if you are not able to bury the item, caste it far away.If you believe your sprite is within you loosely tie a wrist or ankle band of red material before going to bed, and in the morning draw off, do not cut the cloth whole and either put it in securely fastened pot, or if you have a fire, cast it into the fire and the sprite will disappear.

It is said that if a witch’s bottle is ever found and opened, a very angry sprite or spirit will escape.

The Blackthorn being a tree is an iconic image of heraldry and of symbolic significance in various cultures throughout the world. It represents many things, including the Great Mother in her nourishing, sheltering and caring form, as well as a sacred spot of attainment and Spiritual Enlightenment.If you are in the countyside of find a Blackthorn Tree or Bush, you may have one in your hedge, park, just take a few moments to draw in the energy given off from the Blackthorn. PLease take care not to be be spiked by the thorns. Thet are best viewed in flower or with there slow berries.

Being deeply rooted into the evolutionary psychology of our race as well as earth’s powers, it draws water from the soil and stretches up to the heavens and eternity, acting as a world axis. In occult or Gnostic circles, it is seen as being emblematic of the axis mundi, the world pillar, and the centre of the earth itself. It is closely linked to the symbolism of the pillar and the mountain, as well as connotations of a phallic representation, best signified by the ancient usage of obelisks for ritual and ceremonial purposes. It serves as an intermediary icon of the mysterious dimensions between the realm of the Gods and men. A common Shamanic concept has the seeker or healer using the tree in order to transverse the physical realm and bring back secrets from hidden dimensions. Use this power to follow your Spiritual Path, and seek the power and energy to sustain and grow your spirituallity and let it become firmly rooted and grow strong inside you, let it be you staff, your help and guidance and your link to spiritual guidance and reassurance whenever called upon.Let your spirituality lead you to a better and enriched way of living.

Such is the Power of the Blackthorn Tree, I hope you will find it useful if ever the need arises, or if you find yourself or have a friend or relation who can gain some assistance from any part of this article. You may wish to print off the picture or the article, we do not have a talisman, as in our other Spiritual Guide Articles.

If you ever have a problem, and you need assistance on a spiritual level or just need a good listener do not hesitate to contact me and I shall give you my email address, so it will be confidential on a one to one basis only.

About the Author:
I hope you’ve taken some inspiration from this article. For celtic themed gifts please visit http://www.realalternativesite.com/celtic-gifts-c-285.html

Keyword tags: self help,motivation,celtic gifts,the ancient celts

For a lot of people, making any kind of change is extremely intimidating because it looks like a long road ahead that they’re not sure they’re ready to start walking down.

But the truth is that it doesn’t have to be that way. In fact, it isn’t that way because it isn’t humanly possible to travel that whole road at once. Like any other road, you can only go down it one bit at a time.

It’s as though, without realizing it, some people think they have to travel the road sideways, so to speak. As if they have to cover the whole length of the road at once and then, you know, cross the street.

OK, enough road metaphors. The point is that, like anything, making changes has to be done one step at a time. And it’s almost always that first step that is the toughest for people to take.

But the truth is that once most people take that first step, and get started, they see that it is possible to accomplish certain goals and work towards real change.

All you need is a little bit of success at a time. And once you see that progress, it’ll be easier to take that next step, and then the next one, and so on.

I’ve seen it in my own kung fu training, and in the training of others in my school. Anyone who enters the school expecting to be a master in one day leaves once they realize that it’s going to take some work. Anyone who’s really ready to learn knows this already, and sometimes after only one class they’ve seen a bit of improvement, and now they’re excited about learning kung fu. So then they come to another class and learn a little more.

All I did to become a sifu, essentially was go to my classes regularly, work on technique, and then wait for time to pass as it always does. But I had to start with my first step: deciding to go. And then, of course, going.

Unfortunately, we live in a time when there is a desire for a lot of quick fixes that don’t require having to invest a lot of time and effort. Well, it would be great if anything like that worked, but really it’s the exact opposite that consistently gives results.

Why do you think that Alcoholics Anonymous created a 12 step program? And why do you think that they’ve been the most successful organization at getting alcoholics to stop drinking for over 80 years?

They understand how it works, and how to teach the process. And they know that it isn’t the kind of thing that happens overnight.

The first step of any 12 step program is admitting that you have a problem, or, more accurately, admitting that you are powerless over whatever substance or behavior it is.

This will often be the first step in self improvement, also, even if you don’t have a serious addiction. Admitting that you need to make a change is a much bigger step than most people realize. And that’s why it’s so difficult for so many people.

And the next step is sometimes even tougher, and it’s different for everyone depending on the type of change they want to make. It might be contacting a support group, or talking to a job placement firm, or taking a class, or any number of things.

But if you keep your tasks organized and go through them one at a time, you’ll almost certainly see some success. And hopefully that will inspire you to take the next step. I honestly believe that if you adopt that mentality, you can accomplish everything you want to accomplish.

You just need to take that first difficult step and get started.

About the Author:
Mark Yarrobino is the administrator of http://www.learntochangeyourlife.com, a site designed to help its visitors find the best information available for making positive change in their lives. Most of the information is provided in the form of articles and audio interviews with experts in the field.

Keyword tags: self help,self improvement,personal development,goal setting

The Encarta World English Dictionary defines “confidence” as “a belief or self-assurance in your ability to succeed.”

We all know people who appear to be very confident professionally, yet when it comes to personal relationships, appear to be very insecure.

Personal confidence is totally different than professional confidence in that personal confidence is about who you are and professional confidence is about what you do.

PERSONAL CONFIDENCE

What creates personal confidence? How does one become confident in who they are?

If you grew up with parents who valued their own inner qualities and were role models for inner confidence, and valued your inner qualities and supported you in being who you are, it is likely that you feel personally confident.

But must of us did not grow up that way. Most of us grew up with parents or other caregivers who not only lacked personal confidence, but who may have blamed and shamed us, undermining our sense of self.

However, no matter how much we may have been de-valued as children, it is never too late to learn to value ourselves now. The secret in gaining personal confidence is to get to know your true Self – your soul essence – who you really are.

Your true Self is your essential inner qualities that you were born with, such as your ability to love, to be kind and caring, to be compassionate and empathic, and to listen well. It is about your basic goodness. It is also about your creativity, your unique talents, your particular forms of intelligence, your sense of humor, your smile, your laugh – all that is uniquely you.

If you were not valued for your true Self, then it is likely that you are not seeing or valuing your essence qualities. In fact, you might have decided a long time ago that you are not good enough – that you are somehow inadequate as a person. It is this false belief that creates feelings of inadequacy and a lack of personal confidence.

Right now, imagine that you can see yourself, not from the eyes of your programmed ego wounded self, but from the eyes of your higher self – the eyes of love. Visualize yourself as a very small child and look inside at who that child is. What do you see? Is there anything about you as a small child that makes you unlovable? What are the wonderful qualities that are inherent in you as a child? If this child were your actual child, how would you feel about him or her?

Throughout the day today, practice noticing and valuing your inner qualities. If you do something kind, say to your inner child, “I really value your kindness.” If you are creative or funny, express appreciation for these qualities. Day by day, as you consistently value your intrinsic qualities, you will find yourself gaining in personal confidence. When you learn to appreciate rather than judge who you are you will feel personally confident.

PROFESSIONAL CONFIDENCE

Professional confidence comes with time and practice. The more you learn and practice a particular skill, the better you become at it and the more confidence you have regarding this skill. With enough time and practice, anyone can become confident in their ability to perform.

Some people attempt to define themselves by their performance, believing that what they DO defines who they ARE. When this is the case, they will continue to lack personal confidence, no matter how successful they are professionally. When you attach your worth to your external success, then you have to continually succeed to be worthy, which creates much inner stress. If you find yourself constantly judging yourself to get yourself to perform, you might want to notice that it is this self-judgment that erodes your personal confidence.

Confidence as an adult does not come from others approval. Valuing both who you are and what you do is what creates a deep level of inner confidence.

About the Author:
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a best-selling author of 8 books and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Join the thousands who have healed their pain and discovered joy! Learn Inner Bonding now! FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com/welcome.Phone Sessions Available.

Keyword tags: confidence, self-esteem, inner child, self help, personal development, self improvement, Inner Bondi

In 1980, Canada discovered their hero. A young man by the man of Terry Fox decided to walk across Canada in hopes of raising cancer awareness. Not only was this a courageous goal, what made it even more remarkable was that Terry’s leg was amputated several inches above his knee.

In April 1980, Terry started out on the east coast. With little support and trudging through harsh weather conditions – rain, sleet, wind and snow – Terry averaged 26 miles a day. It wasn’t long before Canadians recognized that Terry modeled what it took to meet a huge goal – perseverance.

His fanfare increased and he soon gained support across the nation. Then, nearly 3,000 miles later the country was shocked to hear that Terry was forced to quit his run. Cancer had settled in his lungs and he couldn’t go on. Although Terry’s life ended a year later, his dream lives on.

Nearly twenty-five years later, I heard a speaker at a national conference share how Terry had impacted his life. In fact, he decided to make a film to promote Terry’s courageous dream.

He got all his facts and figures together and met with the board in Toronto to present his project. The response he got was, “You will never get his parents’ support. This takes a lot of money and we don’t have it to support you. You would need the community’s support and that won’t happen.” One by one each board member discounted what he wanted to do. Jack left that meeting very discouraged facing the death of his dream.

As he boarded the plane from Toronto to Minneapolis the flight attendant told him that since there were only three passengers on the flight Jack could sit wherever he wanted. Where would you choose? If it were me, I would head for first class. Jack didn’t. He walked all the way down the long aisle and sat in the very last seat, wanting to be alone.

A young girl then boarded the plane and she walked all the way down the aisle and sat right next to him. Jack took the magazine from the seat pocket and raised it over his face giving her a clear message he wasn’t open for conversation. The girl sat patiently.

A short time later, the magazine started coming down. When Jack lowered it to a reasonable height the girl asked, “May I speak to you a few minutes?” Somewhat irritated, Jack said, “I guess so.” She said, “I’ve been watching you. I know what you’re doing?” With that she bent forward and pulled up her pant leg and showed Jack her wooden leg.

She said, “I had cancer and it is because of you I am alive today. Don’t EVER let go of your dream.” To see Jack persevere with his dream had given her hope to keep living.

Needless to say, Jack didn’t sleep that night. The next morning he got up and knew he had to fulfill his dream. His ‘why’ had just gotten bigger.

It’s because of courageous men like Terry Fox and Jack that many lives have been spared with millions of dollars raised through cancer research. Terry’s dream continues through the annual Terry Fox cancer run. If a young man like Terry – who isn’t even alive anymore — can continue to impact thousands of lives, how much more can you do by fulfilling your dream? How big is your WHY?

About the Author:
Linda Olson’s latest book is “Exceeding Your Expectations: Learning the Ten Leadership Principles that Guarantee Results.” For 35 years she’s been empowering people to take action and make lasting change through her speaking, writing and coaching. For more info go to http://www.madeforsomethingmore.com

Keyword tags: Linda Olson, self help, leadership principles, exceed your expectations, how to fulfill your dreams

Some people call it going with the flow, others calling it rolling with the punches. However you refer to it, the ability to ride life’s waves instead of letting them crash down upon you, is a trait that will serve you well as you go through life. However it’s not necessarily a natural reaction.

Think of all the annoying little things that get to us during the day — getting stuck in traffic, grocery lines, kids screaming, washing dishes, chores and errands that run awry. We often dwell on the fact that we’re going to be late for work or that we’d rather be doing something else than the chore we’re stuck doing at the moment. It’s easy to respond negatively and then get stuck in our annoyance. It’s like getting caught up in a vortex of negativity.

The biggest problem with this type of reaction is that you miss the moment. Yes, you can dwell on what might or should have been, but the simple truth is, it isn’t. And the time you spent wishing it was, is now lost and you can’t get it back.

Imagine how much better you would feel if you could change your reaction? You actually do have the power to consciously choose how you feel, it just takes some self-awareness and practice to change your response.

Mindfulness is a method to help us become more aware of what’s actually going on in any given moment. This awareness allows us to expand our choices about where we’d rather direct our attention. By practicing mindfulness, you will increase your ability to catch yourself before you’re sucked into the negative vortex. Then, you can consciously make a decision to shift your mood.

Mindfulness has a rich history in contemplative traditions as a vital part of spiritual awakening, but the practice of mindfulness doesn’t require any specific religious beliefs, and the fruits of mindfulness are easily within the reach of anyone who pays attention for even a moment.

Mindful awareness of the present moment gives you a choice: would you rather engage in moment-to-moment awareness, or be trapped in the vortex of your negative conditioning?

While washing dishes, is it necessary to feel burdened by daily chores? Just pay attention to the warm sudsy water, the spray, the light, the smell of soap, the clatter of dishes being rinsed and stacked. Why spend so much of our time judging, evaluating, assessing our experience, categorizing it as good or bad, pleasant or unpleasant, with grasping or aversion?

Over time, it becomes more and more obvious how you’d like to be with yourself, and where you’d like your attention to reside: in the habitual pathways of negative conditioning, or in the open-hearted spaciousness of being, itself? Can we look at each moment with less jaundiced eyes, to see the miraculous beauty that’s spread out before us?

Seeing more clearly will also enable us to take better care of ourselves, and respond with compassion to the suffering of others. There is nothing to lose, or anywhere to get to other than here and now. Let each moment reveal itself in its own natural splendor.

About the Author:
To learn how to shift your mood go to http://www.your-pathway-to-happiness.com and get your free report “14 Proven Ways to Raise Your Set-Point of Happiness.” Rik Isensee, LCSW, is a licensed psychotherapist, coach and author of Shift Your Mood: Unleash Your Life! Your Pathway to Inner Happiness

Keyword tags: Rik Isensee, self help, how to be happy, shift your mood, inner happiness

Susan Boyle exceeded our expectations. On Britain’s Got Talent, she not only woke up Great Britain but also had a message for the world. She broke every mold and brought her audience to their feet with a standing ovation within seconds of each performance. She became an Internet sensation and a worldwide phenomenon. What was it about Susan that exceeded our expectations? Was it her courage, her talent, or that she was willing to risk sharing her gift from within?

Last year when my husband and I were on vacation, we stopped at our favorite Trader Joes grocery store to pick up a few things. As we stepped into the store, a van pulled up in front of the store. A woman got out, walked around to the side of the van, opened the sliding door, and pulled down a ramp. Within moments, two young girls came wheeling down the ramp with their motorized vehicles. It appeared that both of them had cerebral palsy. As they went down one aisle of the store and up another, you could hear them giggling and laughing.

Struck by their playfulness and joy, one of the employees picked out some flowers and surprised each of them with a bouquet to put in their cart. Then, overhearing that it was a special day for one of them, he said, “Amy, since it’s your birthday today, besides the flowers I would like you to choose a bouquet of balloons.”

He then got on the intercom and said, “We would like everyone to come to the front of the store and help us sing ‘Happy Birthday.’ Today is Amy’s eleventh birthday.” Everyone in the store – customers and employees alike – gathered at the front of the store and sang, “Happy Birthday.” Amy grinned from ear to ear. She was so excited. That day, that employee not only exceeded Amy’s expectations, he also exceeded mine.

A year later I visited the same store and saw that the exceptional employee was still working there. I introduced myself and found out his name was Eric. I told him about the scene I witnessed the year before and then asked if Amy and her sister were regular customers. Eric said no, that was the only time he had ever seen them in the store. I shared with him how his kindness to these girls impacted my life and that I share the story whenever I speak. Eric gave me a big hug and said, “You just made my day.”

This story, along with Susan’s, reminds me of four important principles:

1) Getting Interested Establishes Trust

2) Initiate the First Step: the Key to Success

3) Vulnerability is a Must to be Able to Trust

4) Expect the Best: Exceed your Expectations

If Susan hadn’t been willing to take the risk of stepping on that stage, an entire world would have missed hearing the magnificent gift she had to share. If Eric had not been willing to take the initiative and reach out to a customer in a special way, Amy would not have the wonderful memory that will impact her life forever, nor would thousands of others be touched as they hear this story.

Through simply sharing a gift or an act of kindness, we, too can impact thousands of lives. The secret is wrapped up in an old principle that says, “Reap what you sow.” If you look at the first letter of each principle outlined above you will discover the acronym that spells G-I-V-E. Give and it will be given back to you. Each and every day we have the opportunity to touch a life and exceed someone’s expectations. In doing so, someone will also give to us and exceed our expectations.

About the Author:
Linda Olson’s latest book is “Exceeding Your Expectations: Learning the Ten Leadership Principles that Guarantee Results.” For 35 years she’s been empowering people to take action and make lasting change through her speaking, seminars, and coaching. For more go to http://www.madeforsomethingmore.com

Keyword tags: Linda Olson, self help, leadership principles, exceed your expectations, how to fulfill your dreams

Today a powerful spiritual hunger is arising as many seek comfort, support and meaning in a world that has spun out of control. There are endless paths to take, yet most have little knowledge of the ways in which Jewish and Zen practice can provide guidance, joy, strength, balance, and how they can heal your life. As we look deeper we discover what these practices actually are and how they enhance, enrich and illuminate one another.

In a sense, Judaism and Zen represent two opposite ends of a continuum: Zen is based upon radical freedom, individuality, being in the present and non-attachment. Judaism comes rooted in the family relationships, love, prayer to a Higher power, and the injunction to hold on and remember. A Jewish heart is warm, giving, human, devoted to family and friends, and filled with longing for the well being of all. A Zen eye is fresh, direct, spontaneous, planted in the present moment. It is unencumbered by ideas, beliefs, tradition, hopes or expectations. These practices are like two wings of a bird: both are needed if we are to be able to fly.

It is too easy to lose sight of the true purpose of any practice. Even with the best intentions, blind obedience, obsession, and group pressure to conform can and do lead many astray. Anger, judgmentalness, and domination can easily replace the kindness, generosity, and wisdom that we all long for. The practice of both Zen and Judaism together, is a protection against this. It creates a balance, clears away the weeds and allows your life to bloom.

The practice of zazen (Zen meditation) creates an atmosphere of love, acceptance, respect, clarity, kindness. Zazen reaches right into the core of who you are and brings forth that which is healthy, sincere, creative and heals loneliness and separation.

As we sit in zazen, concentration grows, stray thoughts lessen, defensiveness dissolves, the heart opens. In Jewish practice, prayer is central. We turn many times a day to the Source, offer blessings, ask for guidance and give thanks and praise. Zen not only illuminates Jewish prayer and teachings, but provides a deeper experience of them. It focuses the mind and heart, allows you to gather your scattered energy and be in touch with your essential self.

In many ways Zen meditation, or zazen, seems to be the opposite of Jewish prayer. During zazen you do not pray for help at all. You sit, back straight, legs crossed, eyes down, facing the wall. You do not speak, reach out, touch, or listen to the troubles of others. Certainly, you do not offer consolation or turn to others for support. In fact, what you thought of as support is taken away. If someone is having trouble on the cushion, experiencing sorrow or pain, you do not interfere. Their experience is precious and they are now being given the opportunity to face it fully. The support you offer is silent and profound, just sitting strongly besides them, facing your own experience, and not moving.

Ultimately, you cannot taste the real fruits of a practice until and unless you take some of it on and apply it in your life. Everyone should carefully observe what way his heart draws him to and then choose this way with all his strength. If you fall into guilt, pressure or condemnation of yourself or anyone else, you have lost the purpose of both practices, which is to bless, awaken and heal the entire world. As you practice daily, your life becomes rooted and filled with insight and joy.

About the Author:
Find out how Zen and Jewish practice can heal your life in award winning book, Jewish Dharma (A Guide to the Practice of Judaism and Zen), http://www.jewishdharma.com. Written by top psychologist and speaker. Contact:topspeaker@yahoo.com, 212-288-0028

Keyword tags: Zen, Judaism, meditation, spirituality, stress reduction, healing, love, peace of mind, self help,

Losing your job is one of the most stressful events that can happen in your lifetime. It can wreak havoc with your finances, your relationships, and your self-esteem. With little control over much of the situation, it’s easy to feel helpless and hopeless, but in reality your perception of your circumstances can make a huge difference.

Losing a job may change many aspects of your life, but it can also be an opportunity for growth. Like most life challenges, how you react to this situation will determine whether you ultimately wind up better or worse for the experience.

Grief

Dealing with job loss is similar to dealing with the death of a loved one. It’s natural to have feelings of shock, sadness and mourning. Some people think they should keep a stiff upper lip, but suppressing emotions can lead to depression. It’s important to allow your feelings to flow and not try to stop them.

Feel whatever you feel, but don’t jump to negative conclusions about what losing your job means. Take each day as it comes, feel into the nature of the changes you’re facing and be willing to discover the next step that makes sense to you, rather than jumping to the conclusion that all is lost. It’s also helpful to reach out for support from others.

Regret

Is it your fault you lost your job? Was there something you could have done to prevent it? It’s natural to ask these questions but you can’t turn back the clock.

Instead of banging yourself over the head with recrimination, forgive yourself and focus on what’s possible rather than dwelling on the past.

It’s also helpful in tough economic times to realize many jobs are lost to downsizing, so don’t blame yourself for external circumstances you can’t control.

You will work again; so in the meantime, think about where you’d like to go and what you’d like to do. Considering future possibilities can help you decide not only what you want to accomplish, but how you’d like to be in the world.

You Are Not Your Job

If you define yourself solely in terms of your outward accomplishments, you can become very disoriented when you lose your job. Some people jump to negative conclusions: I’m not a good breadwinner or parent; so there’s no use for me anymore.

Losing your job is just that: losing your job. But you’re much more than your job. As important as it might have been to you, your job was not the sum total of who you are.

You have many other qualities and skills in your life besides the work you do. Now is the perfect time to take a look at areas of your life you may have neglected: relationships, community involvement, creative expression, even something as simple as cooking or gardening. By engaging in other interests, you may find comfort and a sense of accomplishment that you never expected.

Nothing is Permanent

A healthy way to live – in good times as well as challenging ones – is in the moment. Everything is impermanent; nothing remains the same. Although this basic truth can feel somewhat daunting, it can also be very liberating: when you recognize and acknowledge that everything is constantly changing you can stop wishing for what was and pay attention to what is and what could be.

It’s not uncommon for people who have lost a job to later say it opened up other possibilities they might never have explored, otherwise. It woke them up and made them focus on how they really wanted to spend their life.

You Will Be All Right

You’ll have ups and downs throughout your unemployment and at times you may feel like you’re on an emotional roller coaster. You may be in for a rough ride, but with the right attitude, you will get through the experience and arrive in a better place. You may look back on this time as a road you needed to travel to get where you needed to go.

It’s not only how we deal with external circumstances that enhances our well-being in the world, but the realization that no matter what happens to us, we are fundamentally all right. And we can trust in our own responsiveness to deal effectively with whatever challenges life brings our way.

About the Author:
For some documented keys to a happier life go to http://www.your-pathway-to-happiness.com and get your free report “14 Proven Ways to Raise Your Set-Point of Happiness.” Rik Isensee, LCSW, is a licensed psychotherapist, coach and author of Shift Your Mood: Unleash Your Life! Your Pathway to Inner Happiness

Keyword tags: Rik Isensee, losing your job, career advice, unemployment, laid-off, self help, psychology, job loss

Today a powerful spiritual hunger is arising as many seek comfort, support and meaning in a world that has spun out of control. There are endless paths to take, yet most have little knowledge of the ways in which Jewish and Zen practice can provide guidance, joy, strength, balance, and how they can heal your life. As we look deeper we discover what these practices actually are and how they enhance, enrich and illuminate one another.

In a sense, Judaism and Zen represent two opposite ends of a continuum: Zen is based upon radical freedom, individuality, being in the present and non-attachment. Judaism comes rooted in the family relationships, love, prayer to a Higher power, and the injunction to hold on and remember. A Jewish heart is warm, giving, human, devoted to family and friends, and filled with longing for the well being of all. A Zen eye is fresh, direct, spontaneous, planted in the present moment. It is unencumbered by ideas, beliefs, tradition, hopes or expectations. These practices are like two wings of a bird: both are needed if we are to be able to fly.

It is too easy to lose sight of the true purpose of any practice. Even with the best intentions, blind obedience, obsession, and group pressure to conform can and do lead many astray. Anger, judgmentalness, and domination can easily replace the kindness, generosity, and wisdom that we all long for. The practice of both Zen and Judaism together, is a protection against this. It creates a balance, clears away the weeds and allows your life to bloom.

The practice of zazen (Zen meditation) creates an atmosphere of love, acceptance, respect, clarity, kindness. Zazen reaches right into the core of who you are and brings forth that which is healthy, sincere, creative and heals loneliness and separation.

As we sit in zazen, concentration grows, stray thoughts lessen, defensiveness dissolves, the heart opens. In Jewish practice, prayer is central. We turn many times a day to the Source, offer blessings, ask for guidance and give thanks and praise. Zen not only illuminates Jewish prayer and teachings, but provides a deeper experience of them. It focuses the mind and heart, allows you to gather your scattered energy and be in touch with your essential self.

In many ways Zen meditation, or zazen, seems to be the opposite of Jewish prayer. During zazen you do not pray for help at all. You sit, back straight, legs crossed, eyes down, facing the wall. You do not speak, reach out, touch, or listen to the troubles of others. Certainly, you do not offer consolation or turn to others for support. In fact, what you thought of as support is taken away. If someone is having trouble on the cushion, experiencing sorrow or pain, you do not interfere. Their experience is precious and they are now being given the opportunity to face it fully. The support you offer is silent and profound, just sitting strongly besides them, facing your own experience, and not moving.

Ultimately, you cannot taste the real fruits of a practice until and unless you take some of it on and apply it in your life. Everyone should carefully observe what way his heart draws him to and then choose this way with all his strength. If you fall into guilt, pressure or condemnation of yourself or anyone else, you have lost the purpose of both practices, which is to bless, awaken and heal the entire world. As you practice daily, your life becomes rooted and filled with insight and joy.

About the Author:
Find out how Zen and Jewish practice can heal your life in award winning book, Jewish Dharma (A Guide to the Practice of Judaism and Zen), http://www.jewishdharma.com. Written by top psychologist and speaker. Contact:topspeaker@yahoo.com, 212-288-0028

Keyword tags: Zen, Judaism, meditation, spirituality, stress reduction, healing, love, peace of mind, self help,

Some say that the purpose of life is to seek happiness.

Is happiness the purpose, or is happiness the result of another purpose? Is happiness the meaning of life, or is happiness the result of discovering what has heart and meaning for you?

There is not one right answer to this question. The answer lies within each of us regarding what gives meaning to our life.

WHAT GIVES MEANING TO YOUR LIFE?

Perhaps, in seeking happiness, we discover what has heart and meaning for us. Is this how it is for you? Or is it the other way around for you? Is happiness for you the result of loving yourself and others? Do you find that when you are open and loving, that you feel filled with happiness?

Maybe love and happiness are inseparable. Maybe when we are happy, we are naturally loving, and maybe when we are loving, we experience happiness. If this is the case, then is the purpose of life is to seek happiness, or is the purpose of life to evolve in our ability to be loving and compassionate with ourselves and others?

In my view, it is not important to separate out love and happiness. What is important is to discover what gives your life meaning. In my experience, meaning always has to do with love – with loving yourself and discovering how you want to share your love with others. When you discover this, you will likely be happy.

Perhaps the meaning of life is to discover what has heart and meaning for you and, therefore, brings you happiness. The questions to ask yourself are:

• What has heart and meaning for me?
• What brings me joy?

FOLLOWING YOUR BLISS

Gillian decided early in her life that what had heart and meaning for her was getting married and having children. She had decided that if she did not have children by the time she was 43, that life was not worth living. She started working with me when she was 42, unmarried, childless, and contemplating taking her life.

In the course of her deep inner work, Gillian discovered another source of meaning in her life. She discovered that learning to be loving to herself – to the spark of God that she truly is – was extremely satisfying to her. As she practiced getting to know and love her true Self, she discovered another source of meaning – helping others. She realized that working in finance was not fulfilling to her and went back to school to become a chiropractor.

Gillian currently loves helping people attain excellent health. In addition, she adopted a 10-year old girl whose parents had been killed in an accident. She has found great joy and meaning in loving her adopted daughter.

Gabriel consulted with me because he was depressed. He had become an attorney because that is what his father was, but found that he disliked it. It held no heart and meaning for him. In his soul, Gabriel knew that he was a writer. He decided to “follow his bliss”, as Joseph Campbell encouraged us to do. While Gabriel is currently not making nearly the money he made as an attorney, he is finding his happiness. By choosing to love himself and share his love through his creativity, he is finding his joy.

Love, happiness, joy – perhaps they are all One. If you choose to pursue what has heart and meaning to you, you will likely find your joy.

About the Author:
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a best-selling author of 8 books and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Join the thousands who have healed their pain and discovered joy! Learn Inner Bonding now! FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com/welcome.Phone Sessions Available.

Keyword tags: heart, meaning, happiness, joy, inner peace, bliss, health, self help, self improvement, personal development, Inner Bonding, Margaret Paul