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How can one tell if they are getting addicted to gambling? Well here are some tell tale signs to help you decided whether you do indeed have a gambling problem or not.

• Are you constantly logged on to one of those online casino gambling sites, even at weird hours, say three or four in the morning? Does this happen even on weekdays?
• Is when you’ll get to play your next game all you can think about as soon as you open your eyes in the morning?
• Do you constantly think of getting home to logon to the online casino to gamble while you are at work?
• Are you becoming a recluse and have stopped going out with friends or answering your phone, all you want to do is get online and gamble?
• Are you always working out different strategies to help you win at gambling?
• Do you find yourself borrowing or worse stealing money from your friends or family to feed your gambling habits?
• Are you always thinking that you are going to win the big jackpot, and planning ways of how you are going to spend your winnings?
• Do you try and keep your gambling habits a secret from friends and family, always minimizing your online casino screen when someone walks into the room?
• Are your thoughts so consumed by gambling that nothing else seems important to you?
• Do you often miss meals because you do not want to interrupt your gambling?

These are just some of the main tell tale signs that you are addicted to gambling. If you answered yes to more than half of these signs then it seems that you definitely have a gambling problem and should try seeking some sort of professional help. First and foremost before you can begin to move forward you must first be honest with yourself and admit that you are in fact addicted to gambling. If you are too embarrassed to seek professional help at this time and would like to try and control your gambling addiction for yourself then you will have to set some rules for yourself.

Do not try to stop gambling all at once “cold turkey” as this will not work, remember this is something you have been doing over a period of time, and to stop abruptly can have very drastic consequence. You may experience symptoms similar to cigarette addiction, when the cravings over take you, you will find yourself becoming very agitated and nervous, and you might find it impossible to control your cravings. Take it slowly and gradually, find ways to distract yourself that don’t involve gambling. Try picking up a new hobby, a physical one like cycling or running will distract you, tire you and the endorphins after a good run will make you feel better! If you’re more the sedentary type then why not pick up crafting or a new tv series or a new book or even join a chat room. Whatever you do you will find that can control your gambling cravings as you spend less time on those online gambling websites. If your problem persists remember there is no shame in seeking professional counseling, in fact it’s a sign of strength in that you know when to ask for help.

About the Author:
Sarah Harrigan is a professional casino player and reviewer on http://www.choosinganonlinecasino.com . For straight talking advice on online casinos be sure to visit her website http://www.choosinganonlinecasino.com for comprehensive reviews on the best online casinos and winning strategies.

Keyword tags: Gambling, Addiction, Gambling Addiction, Signs of Addiction, Self Help,

Don’t we all sometimes stop and ponder where the hours in the day go as it seems like you just woke up and it is time to go to bed again? Don’t we wish we had that extra hour or two every day, or better yet a replica of ourselves to complete all the tasks that we do in a day? While we can’t add another hour, or duplicate ourselves we must learn to make the best use of the time or manage our time optimally so we may maximize our talents.

How do we manage our time effectively? This can be through an array of skills, tools, and techniques to achieve specific goals, tasks and missions. This will definitely involve a wide range of activities and these including planning of the activity, setting goals, delegation, analysis, monitoring, organizing, scheduling and prioritizing. One of the ways to manage time is to have personal organizers which can be accomplished several ways.

Earlier personal organizers came in a simple form. People used a diary for writing in all their engagements and maintained an address book for all their contacts. With the onset of a new year, all the information on contacts, birthdays, addresses, etc would be copied again into the current year’s dairy.

Eventually, the personal organizer, day planner, or personal planner evolved as a small book, designed to be portable, usually containing a calendar, address book, and other sections usually including blank paper. These helped in managing and prioritizing schedules and activities and were in a nice, tidy little book which didn’t involve the shuffling of papers.

In today’s day and age, personal organizers have taken the form of electronic personal digital assistants and personal information manager software on personal computers; quite a difference from the original methods of personal organizing. A big and very useful advantage of an electronic organizer over a paper based personal organizer is that you can set reminders and alarms when you need to attend an appointment or event. You can also sync them with your personal computer so that all your appointments and contacts are kept up to date on both. If you have internet access on your PDA then you can also send and receive emails, surf the internet, and much more.

There are numerous personal organizers available in various price ranges, colors and capabilities. You can find them in several different stores ranging from discount stores to drugstores, with the most specialized found in office supply stores. The one that will work perfectly for you is the one that you select and that you commit to using on a regular basis. That is the key and is essential to maintaining organization. These personal organizers help in accurately predicting when the activity will be completed, ensure that deadlines are actually achievable, adapt easily to new assignments and control your workload. This in turn, will save time and ensure more focus and commitment on your part. Another big advantage is the pleasure found in always arriving on time for events and work-related activities; something that would not be as possible without the features gained in personal organizers.

About the Author:
Lillian Esquival writes about time management and other career advice for http://HowToDoThings.com.

Keyword tags: TimeManagement,Self Help,Advice,Personal Management

No matter what situation you work in, or what type of work you do, there will usually be things which from time to time cause you to feel stress. Frequently employees in the workplace will end up having one or two days away from work, as a result of stress build up. For some, their time off may even be longer than that. The key to this is how people manage stress.

Some situations at work may cause you more stress than others; for example some people feel stress because of limitations on their time, whereas others feel stress because of the people they have to deal with at work. Many things are affected by how you handle stress at work, including your relationships with co-workers, your work performance, and even the state of your health.

Nobody can completely avoid stress, and this is an important point you must understand if you want to be able to cope with stress. If you are constantly trying to avoid stress, then your health and work performance are still going to suffer. The next thing that’s important for you to understand is that your stress symptoms are not cause directly by the work pressures, but by the way you look at them and how you manage them.

Businesses are now becoming more aware of the huge effect which stress can have on their employees and their business, and as a result many have stress reduction measures in place. Some examples of these include employment benefits such as massage and gym membership, or ‘mental health’ release days.

A lot of businesses which employ people in jobs that are known to be high stress also employ counselors, who help their employees to cope with their stress at work as well as stress they may be suffering in their personal lives.

We are all affected differently by stress, which means that one person’s symptoms of stress will differ from another’s. Therefore it’s important that you know what your stress symptoms are, as this will help you to cope with them. Amongst the more usual stress symptoms are stomach problems, allergies, sleep problems, back pain and headaches.

Habits such as biting your nails can also develop as a result from stress. If symptoms of stress are not dealt with they can often lead to the development of more serious issues, including life threatening ones such as heart disease and high blood pressure. Serious psychological problems can also result, including difficulty controlling your anger, and depression.

Stress at work does not, however, have to be a bad thing all of the time, and in fact some kinds of stress can improve your work performance and feelings of self worth. For example, if you have been allocated a particularly challenging task because your boss considers you the best person for it, then you will be likely to enjoy the challenge. You will probably then rise to it, even though you might have to put in some extra work.

So, prepare yourself for inevitable stress at work, by knowing how to deal with those times before you get to them. Physical activity is a good way of coping with stress, because stress causes a build up of toxins, which can be released by exercise.

You should also talk to someone about the things that are causing stress at work. It is important to share problems, and this may also help to work out solutions. Deep breathing can also help during times of stress.

About the Author:
Seomul Evans is a SEO services consultant for various free content websites http://www.seo-1-marketing-services.com http://www.articles-cafe.com http://www.seo-marketing-guide.org

Keyword tags: stress,self help,health,self improvement,depression,anger,anxiety,psychology

The Local Time Is Now

What a game yesterday. My thoughts on the game and how it impacts your life will be posted tomorrow.

I had an interesting talk with a client this morning and thought i would write it up for you guys.

David: Stop thinking about the future! The future is not right now.

We hear this all the time, but let me tell all of you this right now: if I could predict the future, you would not be sitting here with me right now. If I could predict the future, do you think I’d be spending this time coaching you guys?

I’d probably take my girlfriend and my dog with me and we’d go surfing on my own private little island. I heard Marlon Brando’s island is going to be up for sale eventually – maybe I’d buy that.

If I could predict the future, I would predict the winning numbers in the lottery. I would tell you the Steelers would win the Super Bowl and I would have put all of my money on it. I would tell you which stocks would rise during Obama’s presidency. If I could predict the future, there are so many different things I would do. But I can’t!

The only thing in life that we have the power to do is to remain present. That is it. We have no other powers.

So if there is a woman that you really want to get to know and you’re thinking about how to somehow swing her in your direction, you’re not really being present. You’re just thinking about how to get her to come to you, instead of really just having a great time. If you’re having a really great time and she starts to see you that way, you’re going to create attraction.

If you’re really enjoying the company of her friends, she’ll start to see you in that way. That’s how women look at things. But instead, you’re just thinking about the future. You’re not even thinking about that day. You could all be just hanging out at a bar on a Saturday night, but you’re not really there. You’re only thinking about how you can manipulate the situation and change the future.

The fact is that the future is not now – the present is now. Stay focused and stay present to what is going on in the moment. It takes a lot of work to truly stay focused in the present.

Client: Is there something that you can do to really work on that? I feel like I can’t really control it on my own.

David: You’re doing it right now – you’re listening to me. You’re listening intently to every word that comes out of my mouth. For the last few minutes, you listened to every word I said, and then you asked a question based on what you heard. And you did it with authority and conviction in your voice. You weren’t nervous, and you did it from your heart. I could see that it came from your heart, and I could see who you are as a person.

So that’s how you do it. You just listen. If you’re outcome-derived, or you expect something from somebody, then it’s not going to happen. You’re just setting yourself up for disappointment.

Don’t expect anything from anybody. If you do, you’ll set yourself up to be disappointed. Why should you be disappointed? Life is an amazing ride. Enjoy it. Enjoy the entire process.

About the Author:
http://www.davidwygant.com

Keyword tags: the power of now, dating tips, self help, dating, hot women

In our self-help society, the conventional wisdom is that you must control every aspect of your life to find success and happiness. What a shock, then, when so many people finally achieve the career goals they have worked so hard for over the years only to discover that the attainment of their goals didn’t bring them the happiness they anticipated.

Could the dissatisfaction be because our definition of success is faulty? Would we find true happiness in success if we evolved from a self-centered, worldly view of success to one that is more God-centered?

Living in a culture that worships at the altar of money, people can find it difficult to view success with God at the center. This is a critical point to fully comprehend, however. What God will reveal to us, if we listen to Him, is that true success is to love Him and to love others as He loves them. Success for a Christian is glorifying His life by the way we are living ours.

It can seem counterintuitive in modern Western culture to believe that by yielding to God, we can actually achieve greater success. The more control we give Him, the more He rewards us. If we listen to Him, He will show us that the only way to achieve this type of success is through humility. Humility is somewhat difficult to learn and to define, but when we see it in someone else’s life, we know it instantly. They live for the Lord and not for themselves.

To think about how to live in humility, one could think about the humility of a child. With that type of humility, we will be filled with child-like enthusiasm and be eager to be led and instructed by the Lord. With such an attitude, we will be teachable, moldable, and willing to change.

Humility is what brings the right balance into our lives. Instead of thinking that we can handle things without God, or feeling unworthy to walk with Him, we recognize that our life in Him is all His grace. When we have that right focus we are yielded to the Spirit and walking in a right relationship with God, and in turn, we grow more in the grace and knowledge of our Lord Jesus.

A good way to think of it is to imagine God holding your hand, teaching you His ways as you walk beside Him. It takes the humility of a child to not get ahead of the Lord and to listen and to trust Him to set the right pace. It also takes humility not to lag behind Him and to remember that in His grace, He forgives our unfaithfulness and even forgets our transgressions as we come back to Him, and allow Him to continue to lead, guide, and direct us. God recognizes that this childlike quality of humility is not possible for us to develop on our own.

When our hearts are hardened by our sinful reactions to life’s circumstances, we forget how to accept God’s helping hand. Yet the Lord welcomes us in our sorrow and repentance with open arms of love, and bestows upon us all the blessings reserved for His children. Once you have put your faith in Jesus as Lord, He is there to teach you what it means to live a life of humility as you purpose yourself to let Him take the wheel of your life.

If you are finding that despite your efforts to control every aspect of your life, you are not finding the happiness and peace you seek, the answer can be found in learning humility. By opening your heart to Jesus and walking with Him, and by turning your life over to Him, you can reach heights of success you never imagined.

About the Author:
Stuart Migdon discovered that his career pursuits left him empty. Upon accepting Jesus, his life turned around and he wrote about his experiences in his new book JESUS TAKE THE WHEEL: 7 Keys to a Transformed Life with God. Go to http://www.LetJesusTakeTheWheel.com for more information on this topic.

Keyword tags: humility, change, success, guidance, Stuart Migdon, religion, self help, Jesus take the wheel

“I am an optimist. It does not seem too much use being anything else.” – Winston Churchill

When you notice your thoughts, which kind of thoughts predominate? Do you find yourself often thinking pessimistic thoughts such as:

* I’ll never get where I want to go. I’m a loser.
* I’m not smart enough to achieve what I want to achieve.
* God is there for others but not for me.
* I’m going to end up losing what I have.
* The world is very unsafe so I have to always be vigilant.
* Why reach out to others? No one really likes me.
* Why put forth effort? There is no point since I don’t have the talent or ability to success.
* Some people just have good luck, but I don’t.
* Things are going too well. I just know that something bad is going to happen.
* Life is too much for me to handle.
* I’m going to end up alone.
* Life for me will always be a disaster.
* There is no point in eating well or exercising – my genetics are against me.
* I’m not emotionally or physically healthy, and this is just the way it is. There is nothing I can do about it.
* I don’t deserve to be happy.
* I don’t deserve to be loved.

And so on…

Or, do you find yourself often thinking optimistic thoughts such as:

* If I work hard enough and stay focused, I will get where I want to go.
* My intelligence and abilities increase with learning.
* No one ever succeeds without a lot of effort, and I can put in as much effort as anyone who has ever succeeded.
* If I stay tuned into and trust my own inner knowing, I can feel safe.
* I am a good and kind person so of course people like me.
* It is not luck that causes people to succeed, but belief in themselves.
* When bad things happen, these are opportunities for learning and growth.
* Life’s challenges present me with incredible learning opportunities.
* When I am ready for partnership, someone will show up.
* Regardless of how physically or emotionally unhealthy my parents were, I can make choices that result in physical and emotional health.
* Everyone deserves to be happy, including me.
* Everyone deserves to be loved, and everyone is loved by God.

YOU GET TO CHOOSE!

Do you realize that you have free will, which means that you get to choose how you want to think? You get to choose whether you want to be an optimist or a pessimist, and which one you choose determines your feelings and actions.

When you look at the pessimist list, can you see that thinking these kinds of thoughts create depression, procrastination, and continued failure? Can you see when you look at the optimist list how thinking these thoughts create motivation, loving action, and ultimate success in work and life?

YOU ARE NOT A VICTIM!

Instead of seeing yourself as a victim of circumstances, of your past, of your parents, of events or of luck, why not start to monitor your thoughts and consciously change them from negative to positive? You will likely discover that changing your thoughts changes your feelings and actions, as well as outcomes.

You have everything to gain and nothing to lose by experimenting with changing your thoughts!

About the Author:
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a best-selling author of 8 books and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Join the thousands who have healed their pain and discovered joy! Learn Inner Bonding now! FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com/welcome.Phone Sessions Available.

Keyword tags: optimism,pessimism,health,love,God,free will,self improvement,self help,personal growth, personal development,Inner Bonding,Margaret Paul

The numbers are frightening – there are millions of people out of work or crossing their fingers they won’t find a pink slip in their next paycheck. More have watched their retirement funds slip away as the stock market plunged. More Americans than ever can’t make their mortgage payments and face foreclosure. Who wouldn’t be afraid in this economic climate?

Do you wish you could close your eyes and wake up on the other side of this mess? If you did, you’d miss one of the greatest opportunities of your life. Did you know that more millionaires were created per capita during the Great Depression than ever since? There is no better time than now to figure out your life purpose, set goals, and design a life blueprint. And the best part is that the process won’t cost you a dime.

How satisfied are you with your life? Think that ‘just getting by’ is the best you can hope for in this economy? That this is the worst time to make any major life changes? Nonsense. You may not have much control over the economy, but you do have control over your own life.

You should be happy with your job, your relationships, your health, and feel that you are fulfilling your life purpose, no matter what the economy. In fact, you’re more likely to ride out the bad times if you’re secure in the fact that your life is on the right track. The problem is that most people don’t know how to set short-and long-term life goals, and they wind up reacting to individual situations and they flounder. They have no life plan. No wonder they don’t feel secure and fulfilled.

Think of your life as a building project. No architect would attempt to build something without a blueprint, so why would you approach your life plan without one? The details may change over time but it will always remain the building block on which you can focus your energies and base your decisions.

The best way to start creating your own blueprint is to take stock of where you are right now. Begin by simply making a chart. Write down the ten most important categories in your life. They can be career, relationships, spirituality, health, or whatever is important to you.

Next, make two columns next to each category. In the first one, write down where you are right now in your life in that area. Be brutally honest in assessing your current situation. For the second column, close your eyes and think of where you’d like to be in three years if no obstacles were in your way. Think hard and big and write down everything you can think of. No idea is too big or impossible and the more uncomfortable or daunting the dream, the better. Each future vision should make you gasp.

Now review the list and rate how difficult it would be to achieve this goal. Use a scale of one to five. If all your scores are low, you’re probably not reaching far enough in your goals and should try the exercise again and this time, reach higher. Interestingly, you may find that some of your biggest dreams really aren’t that hard to attain. Some though, may seem impossible. Don’t worry about that, simply by thinking frequently about your visions, results will begin to appear, slowly but surely.

Congratulations, you’ve begun the process of creating your own life blueprint. You’ve started with visions and goals that are unique to you and your life. It’s the first step in taking control of your future and creating a purpose driven life. While it may not seem it, that’s the hardest part of creating the life of your dreams. Next comes the process of achieving your goals, keeping the promises you’ve made to yourself and staying motivated — and that is actually easier than you think.

About the Author:
For help with your goals, go to http://www.keepanypromise.com and sign up for a FREE 1-hour teleseminar. Karim H. Ismail’s 12-step process will kick-start your life blueprint and help you attain your dreams.

Keyword tags: Karim Ismail, goals, coaching, life coach, self help, attain your dreams, life blueprint

“A woman who I was dating and who I really liked ended our relationship and is dating someone else. I see her all the time at the market and I feel like yelling at her.”

“I keep vowing not to, but I keep getting really angry at my husband when he is distant.”

“I lost my temper with my assistant and now she is suing me. I just can’t seem to help getting furious when people mess up.”

If this is like you, do you know why you continue act this way, even when your angry behavior generally doesn’t work and may end up creating more problems for you? Do you know what is going on for you when you attack and blame? Below are some of the reasons. See if you identity with any of them:

1. You believe that you can have control over others with anger or blame, and that controlling them will get you what you really want.

While sometimes you might be able to intimidate or guilt a person into doing what you want, you can NEVER have control over how a person thinks and feels. At some point, even if a person complies out of fear or guilt, it may backfire on you.

2. You want to connect with someone, such as a partner, but you don’t want to connect through true openness, as you are fearful of being seen and rejected. Connecting through a fight or argument seems like a safe way to connect. If the other person engages in the argument or fight, then you get the connection you want, but if the other person disengages, then you may be left feeling even more lonely and helpless.

3. You have low self-esteem. You are terrified of rejection and engulfment. You fear being alone. You feel insecure and powerless and getting angry and blaming makes you feel more powerful.

The problem is that true power comes from power over self, not power over others. While having control over another might feel good in the moment, since true self-esteem comes from power within, controlling behavior over others never ultimately leads to feeling safe or secure. In fact, it leads to more fear and insecurity when others respond by distancing themselves from you, or resenting you, or resisting you, or rejecting you and leaving you.

4. You are terrified of your more vulnerable feelings of helplessness over others, loneliness, aloneness, emptiness, fear, insecurity, or anxiety. Anger and blame work to cover up these feelings. You have no idea how to manage your pain so you have learned to get angry and blame to avoid these feelings.

The problem is that getting angry and blaming are forms of self-abandonment. While you might believe that it is others, situations, events, or the past that are creating your pain, it is the fact that you are ignoring your feelings rather than taking responsibility for them that is actually causing your painful feelings. Until you learn how to take responsibility for your feelings, you might continue to cover them up with your anger and blame.

5. You really believe that your pain is caused by others rather than by your own self-abandonment, so you feel justified in blaming others for your feelings.

As long as you believe that your painful feelings of anger, fear, hurt, anxiety, depression, guilt or shame are caused by something outside yourself, rather than from your own thoughts and actions, you will see yourself as a victim and have a need to try to control others. As long as you avoid responsibility for learning your manage your feelings of loneliness, heartache, sorrow, grief and helplessness over others, you will try to cover these feelings up with your addiction to anger and blame.

Learning to take 100% responsibility for your own feelings is the key to moving beyond anger and blame. Learning and practicing the Inner Bonding process is a powerful way to learn responsibility for your feelings.

About the Author:
Margaret Paul, Ph.D., best-selling author of 8 books, co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Join thousands who have discovered real love and intimacy! Learn Inner Bonding now! FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com/welcome/relationship_help.html. Phone Sessions.

Keyword tags: relationships,anger,blame,emotional pain,fear of rejection,fear of intimacy,conflict,self help,self improvement,Margaret Paul,Inner Bonding

We cannot fail to notice the credit crisis that is leading, or has lead, (depending on which newspaper you read) to a recession which is expected to go on until at least 2010. January sales started in November, as shops on the High Street struggle to sell their wares, and indeed we have seen a number of big High Street names fall by the wayside already. Car production is being cut, as new cars fail to be sold, and working hours are being reduced in order to save money, with the threat of redundancy never far away.

Times are hard – prices are going up, yet income is coming down, or at best staying pretty static. As an economy we don’t know whether we are coming or going!

This all leads to additional stress for everyone – whether we are looking for a new job, have the threat of redundancy looming, or are just struggling to make ends meet with the rising cost of food, fuel, and the like, an economic downturn is difficult to deal with.

But, there are things that we can do to help us focus on a way through – a survival plan if you like!

If you are needing to change job, because of redundancy etc, then it might be time to think about what you want to do next – do you want to stay in the same area of work or is it time for a complete change? Have the confidence to make the decisions that you really want to make, rather than just the ones you think you should make! Guided visualization can help with this, to help you access the inner strength that will get you moving in the direction you want to be. It might be time to brush up your CV and turn yourself into a very marketable product.

Set new goals – achievable goals. If you had been hoping to save up enough for a fortnights holiday or a new car, reassess realistically…. think about what you NEED against what you WANT. If that means having a shorter break away, or staying in the UK rather than holidaying abroad, then so be it. If you have been looking to change your car, set yourself a budget and stick to it…. get haggling in the showroom, you may be surprised at how much you can get knocked off the price!

Don’t allow yourself to go over your budgets, whether you are doing the weekly grocery shop, or booking a holiday. Spending money you cannot afford is not an option right now – you will regret it in due course.

Focus on the things you have already – do they really need replacing, or is it just that you fancy something new? The old fashioned way of “make do and mend” is very relevant now. Don’t buy new when you can repair old! If it is serviceable, then it will do!

Look at the free things in life and enjoy them! A walk outside in the crisp winter sunshine, or along a deserted beach is a fantastic way of clearing your head and taking some time out. Dig out the board games that are lurking in the back of the cupboard and delight your children with cluedo or scrabble! Invest in a pack of playing cards, and teach your children all those games you learn’t yourself as a child!

The next couple of years are not going to be easy, but the fact is that recessions come, and then they go. With a little effort and realism, coupled with positivity and an appreciation of what we have, not what we can’t have, will get us through, in a stronger position than we would otherwise have been in.

About the Author:
Kimberley Mercer is a partner at http://www.guided-imagery-downloads.com and has been using guided imagery to meditate and relax since a teenager. Kimberley is a member of the Association of Natural Medicine.

Keyword tags: guided imagery,relaxation,self help,relaxation techniques,advice,stress

What do you believe about failure?

The ego wounded part of ourselves, the left-brain part of ourselves that has been programmed with many false beliefs, often believes that:

“If I fail, I am a failure.”
“If I fail, I am stupid.”
“If I fail, no one will like me or value me.”
“If I fail, then there is no point in ever trying again.”
“If I fail, it brands me for life as incompetent.”
“If I fail, then everyone who thought I was smart will now think I am stupid.”
“If I fail, I will have made a fool of myself.”

On the other hand, the loving adult part of us – our right brain, open, creative and learning part of us – generally believes that:

“If I fail, then I just need to work harder, to put in more effort.”
“If I fail, I will have learned valuable lessons that will eventually lead to success.”
“Failure is a part of life. No one succeeds without some failure.”
“Failure does not at all reflect on my worth as a person. I am intrinsically worthy, regardless of success or failure.”
“Failure offers me incredible opportunities to think outside the box, to think creatively. Let’s get to work!”
“I love learning and I love challenges. What I do is not about success or failure – it is about the joy of creativity, learning and expressing who I am.”

Which way of thinking prevails within you? What are the consequences to you of allowing yourself to think from your wounded self instead of from your loving adult?

FAILURE – A PART OF LIFE

The fact is that mistakes and failure ARE a part of life. Instead of fearing them, why not make it okay to make mistakes and to fail? Why not take the onus off of failure? Why not embrace the process of learning and growing instead of only being focused on the outcome of your efforts? Why not focus on enjoying the process of learning and creating something that is important to you?

People who don’t worry about success or failure, who instead are excited about their learning and growing process, generally find their way to succeed. The reason for this is that they don’t let failure stop them. Instead, failure spurs them on to work harder, to put forth even more effort to learn what they need to learn to succeed.

On the other hand, even very smart people, who are dominated by their ego wounded selves, generally allow failure to derail them. Believing they ARE a failure if they fail, they become too afraid to make more effort. In addition, they often believe that success or failure is not dependent on effort, but on ability. When this is their belief, they often give up at the first sign of failure, fearing that, if their natural intelligence and ability is not leading to success, then there is no point in trying harder.

CREATING SUCCESS

Every successful person knows that effort, creativity, openness to learning, and perseverance are what create success, not necessarily high intelligence, talent, or ability. Every truly successful person is someone who has not allowed failure to stop him or her from forging ahead with passion and purpose.

I encourage you to tell yourself that it is okay to make mistakes and okay to fail. I encourage you to see mistakes and failures as wonderful learning opportunities for growth. I encourage you to let go of the outcome and allow yourself to become fully excited about the process learning, of growth, and of creation. Being fully present and excited for the process is what life is all about!

About the Author:
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a best-selling author of 8 books and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Join the thousands who have healed their pain and discovered joy! Learn Inner Bonding now! FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com/welcome.Phone Sessions Available.

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